"Mother of Boys" Blog Series: What Having A Boy Means From Clemmie Tel - FIVE BOYS CLOTHING

"Mother of Boys" Blog Series: What Having A Boy Means From Clemmie Telford

April 28, 2016 2 Comments

We are thrilled to kick start "A Series of Blog Posts From Mothers of Boys" about - well about being a mother of boys.

Here is a digest from the Mother of All Lists with a succinct synopsis about what having a boy means.


I am Clemmie, aka Peckham Mamma. I write a blog called Mother of All Lists. I am mamma to two boys. Bertie, aged 3 and Woody, 16 months. We live in Peckham, South East London.

Being a feminist I have spent years saying how men and women are equal. Which of course they are. But having two boys has taught me that the sexes are undeniably different.

This is my experience of what being a Mum of boys is like:

Having a boy means

●     Getting asked ‘Did you want a girl?’
●     Getting asked ‘Are you going to keep trying for a girl?’
●     Dreading the smell of their teenage bedroom (and potentially walking in on them wanking).
●     Counting your blessings. Teenage girls: surely a 100 times more challenging?!
●     Learning that boys never sit still. They run. They jump. They wrestle. They climb.
●     Until they discover TV. Then they become zombies. The absolute inability to chat whilst staring at a screen is something males are born with.
●     Knowing you are going to lose you boy to another woman one day.
●     Hoping that you will not become ‘The Mother-in-Law from Hell’.
●     Remembering that your Mother-in-Law thought that once too.
●     Feeling a bit short-changed when yours go for the less conventional “Daddy’s Boy” approach.
●     Learning the way to a boy’s heart really is through his stomach. Specifically via cheese and ham. And Pom Bears.
●     Discovering erections start early. It’s funny and freaky.
●     Being thankful that there is less room for error when being gifted boys clothes. There is no boy equivalent of baby headbands.
●     Ok, there is: mini football kit. Shoot me…
●     Whispering to other ‘Boy-Mamas’ “boys are harder than girls”. It may not be true. But it feels good to pretend it is.
●     Despairing at them smashing your make-up all over the carpet. For the hundredth time. Yes, boys do that too.
●     Apologising often for your human whirlwinds and all the friend’s homes they trash.
●     Being pleasantly surprised how quickly sibling arguments are resolved. None of that sulking or holding a grudge that I remember doing with my sister.
●     Gazing in disbelief that those tiny arms and pigeon chest will one day be big and manly and hairy.
●     Looking forward to bear hugs from the big men that you grew.
●     Enduring the entire Thomas the Tank anthology. SIXTY FOUR BOOKS ALL ABOUT TRAINS (yawn).
●     Encouraging gender-neutral toys. Only to find your son trying to ‘fix’ the toy pram.
●     Getting told “I can’t imagine you with girls.” And wonder what the hell that means?!


    Thank you Clemmie. 

    From more lists (and we love a list) check out her blog for the full collection of observational lists about parenting and beyond.  

    To see our full collection of boys (and girls!) clothing - as tested by Clemmie -  please click here.

    To take part in the series please email us - hello@fiveboysclothing.com - we love to share. 

    2 Responses

    Laura Bonnell
    Laura Bonnell

    May 13, 2016

    Spot on! 5 & 2 year old sleep stealing, fridge raiding boys. It’s loud, stinky and high energy, but I love it! I have a Woody too! x

    collette boys
    collette boys

    May 11, 2016

    I have two boys and a girl.my boys are so much easier than my girl xx xx ?

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